Good evening...

Dear friend,
It has been such a crazy summer with so many things barreling my way every few seconds. The air that fills my lungs gets me to the end of everyday when I crash into my bed and recharge for the next day. So many things to do, all different and requiring my undivided attention. I feel stretched and tired, but the days go on, and I am not the worse for wear. Why can't some things simply take care of themselves? I guess that is life. We simply do the best we can with the time that is given to us. It has been so long since I have sat down to talk to you, and I apologize for the delay. I have a million excuses, but they are all hollow, giving you no understanding and leaving me with nothing but guilt. The pains that flow through me right now are nothing that I can't handle, and if they are, I have a bottle of Advil next to my nightstand. I hope that while I have been busy and strained, the rest of the world has been existing without any major drama. I pray for everyone's satisfaction of everyday that passes. If a day is satisfactory, then life is good. I watch and I wonder who else is struggling with my same struggles and who suffers what I am suffering. Who is suffering more? I have been reading. Reading tragedies and dramatics, and I have loved to have an inside peek into someone else's mind. Not the characters' inthe books, but the authors who wrote them. I love to see the words that others use to describe their surroundings, their own thoughts, and their own stories. It seems I cannot find words of my own. A blank page is a haven, a safe place that neither judges nor cares what is spilled accross it. It is warm and soft. It is this way until I push the envelope. When I try to force thoughts out into a spiral notebook, they stop. The words dissapate and stick together. All hopes I have of conveying a semi-intelligent thought slips away into the oblivion. Gone for the ages, and I am stuck without a idea in my pretty little head. As I sit here and ramble, I hope that I have not bored you with the mundane voice that is dictating from my brain. I will be sure to give it a harsh review if you give this one. So, goodnight, and good luck. May peace be just around the corner from where you are and happiness something that finds you at those moments when you are fresh out of hope.

Rebecca