Ask and You Shall Receive

I am not what you would call a "happy" person. I don't have a "positive mental attitude." I don't like everyone I meet, let alone come across friendly to half of them. I don't view the glass as "half full." Let's face it, I am a pessimistic person. Even bright colors can give me a head ache. My freshmen year of college I bought bedding to match my roommate's. We were going to have a "cute" room. The day after finals were over, a flood of Pepto-Bismal pink and Tennesee orange enveloped the trash. I can easily tell you the negative consequences to many actions, decisions, and ideas. I worry about them as well. I don't take risks. I don't try new things. I have been questioning my role in life. I don't see myself as a consequential in one way or another. Don't get me wrong, I have a good life, and I know that, but lately, I have really began to question my self-worth. Am I making a positive contribution to society? Will any of my plans for the future happen? Am I currently achieving my full potential? While I still do not have an answer to many questions, God gave me one tonight. In nine short words, my prayers from the past months were simply answered. I chill ran down my spine. My mouth curved, and it happened. I rush of emotions spread through me. As I bowed my head to give thanks to the Lord, I smiled. I thought of all the things that were good in my life. I thought of how I could do more good. I thought of ways to love, and my life was given meaning. I became a "happy person." While I know this is a temporary burst of emotions, I really do consider myself changed. Tonight, I learned how much I matter, and I rejoiced for events that had previously made me upset. She told me, "I am a better Christian because of you." I was forever changed. I received an early birthday present tonight from God. This is my thank you letter to Him. You never know the impact that you make, or the light that He choses to shine through you. If someone was able to see the light through my frown, then I matter. Everyone matters. It truly makes me want to share the love. The love of God. So, thank you, Lord, for using me. Thank you for encouraging me to be a light in this world, this world of Yours. While I still don't consider myself a complete optimist, if I am able to shine, then I can't be all pessimism and negativity. So, thanks again. The glass is filling up, and I am truly blessed.